Here is 1 thing to avoid in leadership

David Bowman Sept. 23, 2019

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After the devotional leader told us about this wonderful acknowledgment exercise, he instructed us to turn to one another and practice this phrase, “If you are here, I am here,” on those around us. The groups were filled with ministry leaders. Yet standing there behind my plastic chair, not a soul said to me, “If you are here, I am here.” No one even looked at me so that I could say it to them. 

I could not wait for that interminable moment to be over, and discovered this one thing we should always avoid.

Do not leave people hanging. 

Our team often provides mystery worshiper services for interested churches. It is impossible to tell all the stories of having people speak to everyone around you and completely ignore you, the outsider who most needs to be welcomed in. 

Many churches think they are friendly, and they are, but only toward other insiders. One pastor even preached about helping people get connected during one of our team visits. Then he finished by saying that outsiders had to make the effort to get connected. Of course, he failed to explain how those outsiders were to do that. Oops.

My bride loves calling people by name at grocery stores and anywhere else people wear name tags. She knows the sweetest sound in the world to most folks is the sound of their own name. It is a simple acknowledgment that breathes life into weary souls.

This world would be a kinder, gentler place if we lived with an “If you are here, I am here” mindset. 

• Who could use a kind word from you?
• To whom should you write a note?
• Who requires a longer letter?
• What aging relative would enjoy a phone call?

Our grandson is a freshman in high school and is in the marching band. He plays percussion in the drum-line on the sidelines.

When he went to lunch his first day of  high school, he didn’t have to sit by himself. Several of his band friends invited him to sit with them. It was an “If you are here, I am here” moment.

Your new best friend could be a simple acknowledgment away. Take the initiative and start the conversation. Live with an “If you are here, I am here” disposition. 

Take a look around to make sure no one goes unnoticed. It can be humiliating to be ignored.

Photo source: istock 

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David Bowman, (DMin, PCC) is the Executive Director of Tarrant Baptist Association in Fort Worth, Texas. He also serves as a Multiplying Trainer for Future Church Co. Learn More »

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