Leading as stewards instead of owners

Josh Hayden April 18, 2025

Leading as stewards instead of owners Adobe

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."—Matthew 11:28-30

Have you ever felt busy doing the wrong things? Ever find yourself chasing work that doesn't help you to be faithful to the mission God has called you and your church to in this season? How clear is the "why" of your church's programs, events, and budget?

For many leaders, we feel overwhelmed. We find ourselves incredibly busy but rarely productive. There are endless possibilities of what we could do, but discerning what is the right thing to do is much more difficult.

Many churches aim to revitalize themselves, i.e. refresh their current events, programs, and activities with greater clarity with an aim for growth.

But what if your "why" is aimed in the wrong direction? What happens if we've grown numerically but multiplied dysfunctional disciples? Some churches need to begin a remissioning journey, i.e. seek inside-out transformation through discipleship for the sake of our neighbors and world. To remission is to recognize that we must be more committed to the mission God has for us rather than the methods we prefer.

Jesus's heart is humble and gentle toward us

In this Scripture Jesus is saying to each of us: I'm not here to crush you. Burden you. Weigh you down. I'm inviting you to find rest. Rest for your soul and your whole existence.

Gentleness is learning to trust in the unforced and unhurried rhythms of Jesus' grace and wholeness for our lives. And, this same grace is available to our neighbors and community.

This gentleness and humility is a gift God shares with us not based on our performance but on God's heart for us. Amidst all of our leadership anxiety, Jesus is gentle, not harsh. Jesus is not ready to play back the tape of your life to embarrass you, harass you, and shame you into living differently as a leader. And this is true for our churches when we've lost clarity on the "why," too.

Gentle power for our good

It's interesting that Jesus named His humble and gentle heart toward us in the middle of Matthew's gospel and then we see it when the heat is turned up and He's arrested and His disciples flee (Matt. 26:47-56).

In a moment of incredible importance, Jesus doesn't usher in His kingdom through control. Jesus doesn't usher in new life through violence. Jesus doesn't control His disciples through shame. But in gentleness, Jesus embraces the cross so that people can see that God's power is greater than any dictator, king, or ruler could ever show through violence and coercion.

People use power poorly and the hurt they cause is heaped on real people. As leaders, in response to the harsh realities that exist in our world, we don't fight harshness with harshness, we live with gentleness and trust that God's goodness is greater than any ruler, king, or force that exists.

In our world today, it takes incredible courage to lead with gentleness rather than to mimic the ways of so many leaders who think the world is theirs to shape in their own image.

The most important relationships in your life are aching for you to trust that Jesus's goodness is greater than the powers you think are better than God's love. When you sense anxiety and a loss of control, try gentleness. When we learn to stop forcing our way in life, we'll often discover that Jesus has already gone ahead of us, working for our good.

We are stewards, not owners

We can be gentle leaders in the world because the mission of God cannot be defeated (Matt. 16:18) and we did not create it. We are stewards of a mission that God has invited us into as leaders, pastors, and citizens of the Kingdom. Remissioning leaders who help churches to disciple their people for their own good and the good of the neighborhood, lead in such a way that people move from control to humility.

Remissioning leaders help people to give up the illusion of control and that the church is "theirs." Owners say: "the church is mine and I will protect it and my interests at all costs." Stewards say, "the church is God's and I will bring my gifts, skills, and resources to help tend to it, care for it, and trust that the long-term fruitfulness is beyond what I can do on my own."

How can we make disciples that reflect Jesus's heart of gentleness and learn to steward the mission God entrusts to us for the sake of our neighborhoods?

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