How I became a world expert in family leadership

David Bowman May 28, 2019

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Around 25 years ago, I served a growing church while also working on a Doctor of Ministry degree. Our son had started school, Baby Girl was a toddler and truth be told, I was overwhelmed by the responsibility.

Every time I attended chapel at Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary, the guest speaker was introduced as “The World’s Foremost Expert in Something.” I wondered what I would ever become the world’s foremost expert in.

I discovered what it was while lying face down in the carpet crying my eyes out. Taking care of my wife and children, navigating a church through growing pains and staying up late every night to read and write took a toll.

Through those tears and that anguish came a resolve to become “The World’s Foremost Expert on My Wife and Kids.” I decided to know them better than anyone else. I learned to love what they loved and participate alongside them in their favorite activities.

I drove them to school in the mornings and picked them up in the afternoons as often as possible. I learned to listen so that they would talk. I discovered that a well-placed and well-timed open-ended question stimulated conversation when “How was your day?” did not.

We learned, played and laughed together. We shared movies and books and television shows. We learned to reason together and to celebrate both big and small moments.

When we moved to our present location, my bride wanted to finish her MBA which was interrupted years before by a move and a birth. My job was to research the local educational options. We found the right program at the right price. For the next two years, she spent Monday evenings and Saturday mornings in class. She graduated with a perfect 4.0 GPA and named a University Scholar.

September 11, 2001, impacted my son, deciding that someday he would enter the military. After completing a reading program focused on great historical military leaders and those of more current campaigns, he learned about the challenges and sacrifices of such a life and wrestled with the consequences of battle.

He first chose college rather enlistment and was accepted to Texas A&M. However, now he is a captain in the Marines, married and has a baby on the way.

Baby Girl and my bride went to Guatemala with Buckner International after Baby Girl’s junior year of high school and served in the orphanages. It broke Baby Girl’s heart to see so many children who would never enjoy the good life she had. She decided she would go to college as a political science major, attend law school and protect the little ones.

Recently, she became an Assistant District Attorney. She wants to move up through the system to the Special Victims Unit where she will protect the little ones.

Our daughter-in-law is well on her way to becoming The World’s Foremost Expert on our son. And our son-in-law is on the same path with Baby Girl. I will rejoice when they arrive at that point. I will celebrate with them the completion of a large part of my life mission.

No person will ever beat me out in this regard concerning my bride. It is fun continuing to learn her intricacies after all these years.

Walking and talking, playing and praying together is where I encounter my greatest happiness, my deepest contentment.

This life has taken me many places into adventures of all kinds. However, I will finish my life with few regrets because I am completely content with missing anything and everything which takes me away from my role as World’s Foremost Expert on My Wife and Kids.

Photo source: istock 

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David Bowman, (DMin, PCC) is the Executive Director of Tarrant Baptist Association in Fort Worth, Texas. He also serves as a Multiplying Trainer for Future Church Co. Learn More »

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