How do I lead someone who continues to fail?
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Recruiting duty in the military is one of the wildest, fast-paced and aggressive working environments I have ever worked in and led others through. There is no room for someone that isn't driven, successful, or has no time for mistakes.
The fate of the U.S. military lies in the hands of the men and women working to recruit America's finest. This was the lens I led through as someone in charge of a handful of recruiters.
One of my biggest challenges was a young Marine that seemed to just always fall short of the mark; he just could not hit his goals month over month. Due to the environment, any Marine that couldn't hit their monthly goals had to report in to the Commanding Officer for a "pep-talk" of sorts.
It never failed, month after month this Marine had to report in, and after every conversation he looked more defeated than the month before. I safely assumed that eventually he would get tired of being yelled at and just start getting better. Who likes reprimand? At the end of the day, he was a Marine and he had a job to do, so he needed to figure it out.
During this time, I remember reading the Gospel of John. Many people are familiar with the verse about forgiveness, the one that shows that only those without sin can condemn others (John 8:7).
However, this verse hit me differently this time. Jesus, in pure love and forgiveness, doesn't see the women in this story for the mistakes she has made and her failure; instead, He sees her as someone of value. This woman wasn't defined by her mistakes, and Jesus shows her that there is hope amidst the fear of judgement.
I began to think of the young Marine in my office. I had spent so much time driving him to produce, warning him of the impending conversation with our Commanding Officer, and leading him to focus on the unavoidable consequence of failure. What I hadn't done is learn why he was struggling, why he kept missing the mark.
When I dug into his work and productivity, I learned that he was doing twice the work of every other Marine in the office and he was meeting with more than double the young people of any other Marine in the office! So why was he still struggling? What I learned from this and a conversation with him is that his issue wasn't in his work ethic.
You see, English wasn't his first language, and he was struggling to communicate with and understand the young people he was meeting with. His struggle wasn't with gaining interest and finding quality people, it was with understanding their life needs and communicating military opportunities.
As soon as I learned this and we worked through it, he became one of the best recruiters in our office; when he brought a kid in that kid was always good to go, motivated, and could make it through training.
I wonder, how many people in your organization aren't getting the care and time that they need? It is easy to see their shortcomings as failures, but when you take the time to dig in you may learn that these aren't failures at all.
Rather, they are opportunities to help them grow disguised as failures. Maybe there is a close friend or family member that you have given up on because they seem to drop the ball over and over again. Could these situations simply be a misunderstanding of who they are, what their strengths are, and what they struggle with?
Jesus corrected the men and women in John by telling them that any of them that was blameless had the opportunity to condemn this woman. When they took an honest look at themselves, they all realized that no one is perfect. It was only through this discovery that the community, and the woman, were able to move forward together.
 | Sean Lord is a pastor, husband, and father. He enjoys writing about leadership, theology, and ministry. He served in the U.S. Marine Corps and currently pastors at one of the largest churches in the U.S. He spends much of his time mentoring and coaching pastors as well as leaders outside of the church. Learn More » |
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