Have you mistaken a gift for a given?

Mike Bonem July 15, 2023

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In the final episode of the popular series "Ted Lasso," Ted reflects on what he has learned during his time in England. In his typical folksy way, he observes, "Air conditioning is a gift, not a given."

Having grown up in a middle-class home in Texas, I don't remember a time without air conditioning. (Apparently my parents' car didn't have it when I was a baby.) Because of this, I tend to think of air conditioning as a given, something to which I am entitled. And it's not just air conditioning. If I'm honest, the list of things that I treat as givens, rather than gifts, is embarrassingly long.

Mistaking gifts for givens has many implications for me, and perhaps for you as well. I am grateful for gifts, but the givens (like air conditioning) are taken for granted.

I am less likely to find joy in the simple things and the small moments in life when I fail to see them as gifts. A life full of givens can create a constant sense of dissatisfaction and wanting more.

What are some of the gifts that you've overlooked or treated as givens in your role as a ministry leader? Maybe it's a few people that love you deeply, just as you are, with whom you don't have put on a façade of having it all together.

It could be a staff person or volunteer who regularly lightens your load. Or the people who genuinely seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness. Or enough money in the bank to pay your salary and the church's bills this month. Or just the flexibility to set your own schedule.

Outside of our professional lives, there are also many gifts that we tend to overlook. Family, close friends, and mentors. A roof over our heads, and food to eat. Freedom in what we say, think, and do. The beauty of nature, whether that's a single flower or a panoramic view of the mountains.

The last several years have been difficult for pastors and other ministry leaders. A global pandemic, national polarization that spilled into the pews, declining participation in the church, a growing mental health crisis, and uncertainty about the future are just some of the burdens that leaders carry.

I don't want to suggest that we should put on rose-colored glasses or ignore these serious issues. But I do think that remembering our gifts can give us a different perspective as we go about the work that God has called us to.

I'll close with Paul's reminder of the most important gift: "I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in his holy people, and his incomparably great power for us who believe" (Ephesians 1:18-19a).

Treat this as a gift.

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Mike Bonem is an author, consultant, speaker, church leader, businessperson, husband and father. He has an MBA from Harvard Business School and a breadth of experience in ministry and business, including 11 years as an executive pastor, consulting with Fortune 100 companies, and leading a start-up business. This article was first published on MikeBonem.com. Used with permission. Learn More »

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