Don't just start new habits—kill old ones

Tom Harper

Don't just start new habits—kill old onesiStock

Every leader has habits that drain his or her effectiveness. I'm not talking about parking in the same spot or drinking coffee at the same time every day – I'm referring to those bad habits that slow us down, embarrass us, impede our effectiveness or hinder our leadership in some way.

I leave conversations too early. I don't ask enough questions. I avoid meetings. I don't finish a task before I glance at the squirrel going by. I don't spend enough social time with people. I hesitate to engage, and probably come across aloof.

So that's me. What about you? Do you speak too quickly, harshly or voluminously? Do your emotions get the better of you?

The point is to identify your bad habits and work on them. If you and I want to grow as leaders, we can't allow our same old selves to define who we'll always be.

One reason God allows pain into our lives is to refine us and deepen us. He wants to conform us to the likeness of his Son. That's radical change.

For you, God, tested us; you refined us like silver.
—Psalm 66:10

Remove the dross from the silver, and a silversmith can produce a vessel…
—Prov. 25:4

The main ingredient of a silver forge isn't silver—it's fire. Lots of heat produces a little valuable, malleable, precious metal.

God will of course continue to refine us in ways we never could on our own. He works on the heart; we can work on obeying his Word and exercising self-control.

So as we try to control our tongues, eyes and actions, let's allow the Lord to fashion us into beautiful silver vessels that he can use to pour out grace on those we lead.

Even if becoming silver hurts.

Each one should test his own actions.
—Gal 6:4


Excerpted from Servant Leader Strong: Uniting Biblical Wisdom and High-Performance Leadership, by Tom Harper (DeepWater Books, 2019).


Tom Harper is publisher of BiblicalLeadership.com and executive chairman of Networld Media Group, a business-to-business publisher and event producer. He has written five books, including Servant Leader Strong: Uniting Biblical Wisdom and High-Performance Leadership (DeepWater Books, 2019) as well as the Christian business fable Through Colored Glasses and its sequel Inner Threat (DeepWater, 2022).

Learn More »

More on Productivity and Time Management


Don't miss any of this great content! Sign up for our twice-weekly emails:

Free eBook

Success Unlocked: The Transformative Power of Questions

This isn’t just another leadership book—it’s your invitation to discover how Christ-centered questions can transform the way you lead and live. Packed with real stories and timeless wisdom, it shows you how to grow your influence, deepen your faith, and lead with the same life-changing impact Jesus did.

Download Now


Our Writers

Rev. Ralph Mayhew has been leading people for more than 20 years. He is a …
Gary L. McIntosh (PhD, DMin, Fuller Theological Seminary) is president of the Church Growth Network …
Sean Lord is a pastor, husband, and father. He enjoys writing about leadership, theology, and …

Already a member? Sign in below.

  or register now

Forgot your password?

b'S2-NEW'