Book review: When to Walk Away: Finding Freedom from Toxic People

by Guest Contributor*

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*This contributor requested to remain anonymous. 

This 245-page book, When to Walk Away: Finding Freedom from Toxic Peopleby Gary Thomas (2019), challenges us to rethink how we deal with the toxic people in our lives.

The book is formatted into 21 chapters. Several of the chapters provide specific examples and ideas on a particular topic such as Toxic Marriages or Toxic Children.

At this point, I’d like to offer a disclosure: I am married to a toxic person and I believe that’s why I chose to review this book.

At the time I chose it, I did not know the term “toxic person,” but as soon as I read the characteristics I knew I was married to the type of person this book discusses:

I found three markers that tend to be true of most toxic people. They tend to have a murderous spirit. Now that sounds so intense, but by murderous spirit, it means they’re murdering your reputation. They’re murdering your joy. They’re murdering your peace. They’re murdering your schedule. They’re murdering your peace of mind. They’re basically destroying your life and your sense of happiness. 

  

Perhaps, if you have a person like this in your life, you may think like I did: If I  just pray more, forgive more, be kind more, turn my cheek again, serve them more, serve them better, then they will change.Sadly, this is often not the case with toxic people.

Gary shows us Jesus’s example, time and again, of how our Lord dealt with these types of people.

He walked away.

The book gives many real-life stories in various situations, from personal to work related, and what each person did. Sometimes Gary shares the result of the person’s choice on how they dealt with the toxic person, sometimes not (to my disappointment).

My biggest take-away: Stop investing in unreliable people—and that is worth its weight in gold.

Photo source: istock 



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