4 questions for the 2021 grads in your life

Jim Farrer May 8, 2021

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Graduation observances are important events in the life of a congregation. These ceremonies are opportunities to assure the graduates: "We've pulled for you; we've prayed for you; we're proud of you."

What else do graduates need to hear? Pastors may consider adapting these thought-provoking questions and answers when they address their congregations' grads in a sermon or in written recognition.

1. Are you a random blob or a masterpiece?

Many attribute their identity to their ancestry, education and memberships, but our main source of uniqueness is that we are made in the image of God. Of the billions of individuals on earth, we each have our own fingerprint and voiceprint. Today, iris identification technology takes less than one second. Your personal DNA demonstrates that you are intricately-designed creations rather than randomly-produced "blobs."

Ephesians 2:10 reassures us: "You are one of God's masterpieces.…" Good resources to explore God's craftsmanship of humans include Fearfully and Wonderfully Made and In His Image both by Dr. Paul Brand and Philip Yancey. Also, I Am Joe's Body by J.D. Ratcliff incorporates 33 articles, taken from the most successful series in the history of the Reader's Digest, which demonstrate the amazing physiological makeup of the body.

2. Is church worth your time?

Duke University researcher Harold Koenig, MD, has overseen the analysis of peer-reviewed journal studies from 1872 to the present on religion and health, most of it concerning Christianity. His summary of the importance of religious commitment in a religious community follows:

"In general, (people) cope with stress better, they experience greater well-being because they have more hope. They're more optimistic, they experience less depression, less anxiety and they commit suicide less often. They don't drink alcohol as much, they don't use drugs as much, they don't smoke cigarettes as much and they have healthier lifestyles. They have stronger immune systems, lower blood pressure, probably better cardiovascular functioning and probably a healthier hormonal environment physiologically …and they live longer." (beliefnet.com 5/06)

He also concludes: "Lack of religious involvement…is equivalent to 40 years of smoking one pack of cigarettes per day."

A massive Connecticut Mutual Insurance survey showed that the most important variable in promoting a healthy lifestyle is to be an active member of a church. Various studies have reported that committed church attendance can extend your life between three and seven years. In fact, the National Health Interview Survey which followed 21,000 people over an eight-year period demonstrated an eight-year longevity difference if you attend church more than once a week.

3. Is it smart to live together?

A university student informed her father that she was going to move in with her boyfriend. With a stroke of insight, her dad replied, "Since you have become familiar with doing research in your classes, why don't you investigate the pros and cons of live-in relationships and make an informed decision."

Following are some of the statistics this young woman might have discovered.

Research compiled by the National Marriage Project at the University of Virginia, indicates that "cohabitation is associated with a 46 percent higher divorce risk." Further, the project found that "cohabiting couples report lower levels of happiness, lower levels of exclusivity and sexual satisfaction, and poorer relations with their parents…. And a three times greater rate of depression than married couples."

Sociologist Linda Waite of the University of Chicago notes that the violence rate for live-ins is almost double that of marrieds. Leadership magazine reported that 40 percent of live-in women reveal they had endured a kind of sex they did not want or did not enjoy.

A report compiled by the Marriage and Relationship Education Center concluded that children of co-habitating parents are nine times more likely to suffer physical, sexual and emotional abuse.

A similar British study related that children living with mom and her boyfriend were 33 times more likely to be abused physically and sexually than children living with both biological parents.

4. Will you check out society's lies?

At pro baseball games the big screens report radar results on how fast the pitchers threw. But according to USA Today (10/13/06), the guns are almost always "jacked-up" by at least four mph.

For decades the media have asserted that half of marriages end in divorce. They simply take the total number of marriages in a year (about 2.5 million) and divide it by the 1.25 million divorces. The more accurate way of determining the divorce rate would be to ask how many of those married have also been through a divorce. The real answer is less than 24 percent. Author Shaunti Feldhahn reveals that the divorce rate dropped 27 percent if the person attended church compared to those who did not attend. Other studies show a 25 to 50 percent drop for church attendees. (The Christian Post 5/16/14)

What else will you choose to share with your congregations' graduates?

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Jim Farrer is the founder of Vital Signs Church Consulting and a member of the Society for Church Consulting. A broadly-trained church consultant, Jim is also a veteran of ministry positions in Canada and the U.S., he has trained leaders from 18 denominations and led seminars and coaching sessions nationwide. His articles have been published in the Journal of Evangelism and Missions and the Great Commission Research Journal. You can reach him by e-mailing revup1@yahoo.com or calling 814 629-5211. Learn More »

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